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happenings at nerves is something
known to the privileged ones
it can be visualized from the environment
this beauty points to the factual reality
if it gets actualized at one's nerves
this state of intellectual excellence is simply something too realistic and exotic that shall /can make the things look too rosy that hitherto look too dull or monotonous
but for uninitiated ones
its simply Greek to their brains
howsoever one have studied at his/her books or might have acquired the degree(s) in umpteenth
I often feel like
whilst stepping my way at Rajpath
its a happening place over the yrs
I see the tourists
I do ask whether they realize the fact
heart says yes
but brain differs
so my twin evils start fighting
like the kids at their playground
just for nothin
but how far this is relevant over the space and time paradigm
it depends
how far you can evolve to that state of mind
whether you imbibe others effervescence
at your inner psyche
it may be too hi fi way of thinking
but its a reality
source: neha.c.mehta, kiran&anu, Dr.Dimple
when I am writing this
lots of relevance has already been lost
as it became the simple causality to the whims of times
but why
my heart often asks me like a kid with new found world around
me the docile entity around
search for the soul and face
that shall come
with the flowers of replies
the time has crushed under
but my nerves : they simply don't accept defeat
like the fighting general
who believes the reinforcement is just at hand's distance
and dies to the last bullet
fighting for the cause for the others
who hardly remember after a months time
but why such fighting spirit came a coincidence
with the such volcanic heart
may be life is never complete
heart asks too much
brain realises the reality quotient
and the twins fight with each other
to find a solution
that never comes
as time knows
it has not evolved
to be that quick
source: Neha.c.Mehta, kiran&anu, Dr Dimple
at this moment of time my place of happenings is showing its muscular/material+electronic prowess to tel its potential adversaries : never to think of challenging this sovereign entity and waste the valuable lives around.
I am not detailed for duty this time so I am trying to prove my worth around what beauty and love can achieve and infinite frontiers of my capability to realize its worth and reality but I have one different aspect in that I need not tel to my adversaries that I am a horrible genius around and no body can ever think of simply catch my psyche none the least simply understand me
the reason is too evident: I myself tel a lot to praise my love and its infinite reality/horizon aspects to fight my own monotony
I know Nature is so cruel it never allows a genius brain to have his/her own world of reality eg. Munshi Prem Chand of Hindi literature, Harbind Khurana of the genetics fields, and the list is endless, as here I do not wish you to tel the general knowledge of the world's happenings around.
but I feel to tel that Hitler was also a genius as he visualized to unite the German Empire but he could not know his weakness , not to cross the laxman Rekha in becoming an opportunistic to act exactly like his past adversaries who really did on ground reality.
this is a preface only , to tel the worth of this beauty queen, who can evoke the forbidden

I remember to my last nerves I have never discussed my love with anyone live
but yesternight happened to be abysmal different
the questionnaire asked too much to her best know how
but I know she hardly could make out the horizons of my love
Love is in fact that exotic to the extent just like if someone asks you : just prove to the mundane in scientific terms that if god has a conceptual existence/abstract/physical/metaphysical/psycho-psychiatric/existential/system driven/or else something too beyond
but love remains undefined howsoever a person claim to be the learned/genius etc
but love comes in zillions of ways
this beauty queen is a form of love only
there are so many beauties around me: but she only could evoke the volcanic eruption in otherwise sleeping brain altogether for yrs together
I do not know the mood of times
as its too foolish even to think of that
today its a holiday for all but I am working like as in my office
my love of work is not definitely love but a foe in need
its exactly contrary to what I have explained in the ibid thoughts
but even this foe takes the love shape when put on the scale of time and space
I wondered at my English teacher who used to come at around 6AM every day: I got to know he had only one train as an option to travel to his duty place: he used to sit in a sparse lawn and just remained busy reading something (I don't know what he really read at that event of time.): but I wonder til date how to define my that teacher: a romantic /existential/duty bound/system constrained or else
love is such an infinite phenomenon
I can write whole of my life
but it will remain
undefined
source: Neha.c.Mehta, kiran & anu ;Dr. pankaj .bansal
my heart is divided into two parts
just like Pakistan and India
previously it was one only
my love finding quotient became too hot point
the heat generated was too intense
it simply divided my heart
the twins are at logger heads all the time
one is extremely positive, euphoric, childish, optimistic and adventuristic
the other is dud too negative, pessimistic stuff, always weeping like a poorly developed child, exactly like cosmic black whole that absorbs my happiness so generated with assiduous efforts, its a real evil with me
but I have to live with the both
as they have one common factor too
both of them love my love
and I can not live without my love
now it means
I have to choose between the devil and deep ocean
I hope one day
my love shall come
define the parameters
peace and romance may return
but til then my fights shall never stop
\
but I really don't know
the time line of my love
I do wonder
at the constraints of my live world around
and simply hibernate my time
to tide over the traumatic times with me
source::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
when my know how talks to me like you could have
my eternal questions come flashing
I know science can go to the extent of making electronic life come replace the bio life in its entirety
this may look like too foolish
but I know its not that
just like I often say I love you and find the resonating waves of my heart
the question takes another twisty twirly
would that electronic life be blessed with heart and brain to that extent
the reply is absolute yes
Now my dearest Neha will simply laugh at the commonsense of choosing her snap to that fantasy
but the reality is like that only
she will definitely ask : can you define the time line
reply is simply No.
but why I'm so obsessed with that professy of science at this page and time
I remember the lead heroin of kalidas abhigyanshakuntalam
she asked clouds to go to ujaani (the capital of the king, now Ujjain if I remember correct but I think another name is there on the map of India.) and ask and feel my love (the king.) that your love simply misses you like the world around
Now she will again laugh at the combinations of thoughts
but I have not finished my writing as yet.
she is first person who evoked the writing habit in my scientific brain to the extent that today I ask my clouds to go to that place where my love is pulsating her life and tel the ibid thoughts
but I know
this will never occur
she will definitely ask why so pessimistic thoughts
my reply is
I have not defined the time line for the electronic life come true more than equal to that of bio life what we see around today
she will say again: I have not understood what I really want to convey
I will say
nothin
have a nice time
source: Neha c. mehta. , Kiran and anu, Dr. pankaj . bansal
I was trying to put my best efforts to draft a reply
this was something regarding under right to information act
my heart suddenly asked
what is your right to information act
my running pencil didn't stop
but my eyes became wet
my senior was just observing me
he is more than a friend to me
he asked as follows:
Ahuja sir you think that we are fool around sitting here to have a cup of tea with you: can't you share something with us
I took my time to soak off my eyes
as its a bio process
my draft was ready and I put the pencil down
he said what makes your pencil stop
I replied : nothing sir : I have covered all the intricacies and will submit to my senior if he is convinced or not
damn it: I am not asking that you're less genius to your boss
I replied : sir will you take a cup of hot tea as I feel like that
he stared at me but kept mum
both of us were aware of our silence.
I saw through my window panes as the scene outside seemed too romantic
but I do not know
where are you these days
source: shipra.v and :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
when you are fast asleep
I am awakened to the time
at my hand
its not that its a rare thing with me
none of us can escape
the happening coincidence may variate to the infinite
the landscape of my happenings
guarded to the teeth at this moments
I do know the terrorists have a cause
but life ways matters
kaleidoscope of our happenings
Armed forces have the most docile hearts
but the strength of their nerves is known to the privileged ones
I do ask myself
is it the fights of hearts
or the nerves
may be none
the conflicts emanate from the system
driven by such aspects
no body have actual control
I do ask at the same breathe
do my love has that constraint
the reply is absolute yes
but who is my love
probably god has yet to carve out its plans
I see the environs
feel the pulse
not only of the live world
but the sands too
as I know
I can make sand dunes of my love
only to be blown away
at the mercy of the winds
but who creates such winds
definitely not god
but my question remains unanswered
I know that
so is my love
source: Neha c.mehta, kiran and anu,Dr pankaj.b

this time the environs where I fight my moments
lit large with monotony & happening of the power equations
put together
this beauty queen reminds me
never get tired
fight the system
to the finish
particularly those
who have destroyed your heart
A soldier is meant to die unheard
least understood
the tethering pains he went through
at the last laugh of his conscientiousness
I do know
the vicious circle of agonies
made all around
with conspiracies
laden with sweets of the worlds around
but I do realise the system constraints
then whom to target
your own self
of the environs
the best replies
that comes from the aura of this snap
give a damn to whole hell
live your own life
never expect whatsoever
from the dearest ones
defined to torture your
the inner most
life is what you are
see the mirror
love yourself
forget whether
you have smart or ugly looks
the righteous pathways
give a damn bullshit rejection
to the infinite
who have hurt your feels
so pious
sacred the last threads
never ever repent
send the value system to the dustbin
as its not only you
who have to take burden
of the whole hell around
source: this article is meant to went off my hurt feels evoked by my own daughter., but inspiration is neha c.mehta

me any my heart
they hardly see eye to eye
I do wonder what is the hell around
why my fights can't end
Is it. I am meant for fighting all the way around
their are no ammunition, least defined enemies but with infinite fronts that are active round the clock
is that the real life
I loose my sense of normalcy
Is it my psychiatry know how is bullshit damn thing around
but I know I am residing at the other end of the world
but why I fail to realize
that is the way of life
why I get perturbed that much
one thing is certain
I have no fighting partner with me
that part is the triggering of defeats all around
and my fighting spirit simply never accepts the defeat
who are my enemies
I ask too much of mine
but find
at the fag end
Its me
me and me
no body else
but why I can't realize
the enemy hidden at my psyche
I really don't know
how to target this enemy
and destroy it
with the ultimate know how that I possess
I try and try
but failure waites for
at every another second
I still stand up
starts fighting
some time
day and night
they feel jealous of me
but I hardly get accomplishment at that
source: kiran and Anu Malhotra, Pankaj Bansal

my work alcoholism has induced practical psychiatric disorders in my psyche
psychiatry otherwise advises to remain busy
that is a fact beyond contest quotient
busy life is not a friend
its a foe in need
one day a saint went to Kailash Parwat to bet the bliss of lord Shiva. He did get Him because of his arduous efforts. Lord Shiva wanted to pay him some gift of a real worth. He picked up three hand full of ashes of his eternal lit fire Owen . He offered with utmost respect to the man. And the person also accepted in equal respect. On way back he saw a river with thunderous flow of waters, it made him think that lord has given me ashes: bullshit the insane god:he threw the ashes in the water and suddenly saw it turned into precious stones with glitters equal to that of Sun. The person went back to the Lord to pay his sorry feels and repentance at nerves.: hoping that Lord will again bless him with the same. Lord asked the person I had already given you what I had with me.
the daily chores and me
the eternal with constraints
I do realise
the pinch of the man
but the reality is something different
I hardly know
who I am
the lord or the man
source:::::::::::kiran malhotra.

me and my heart
twin sides of an airplane
none can survive single
but why we have separate energy sources
I walk with my steps
smiles on my lips
but too silent
like my twin sources
who drives me
and why
why I fly at all
and for which direction
I ask at my lonely moments
I dive with crazy twists
whilst I remain too calm
at the same time
what is this
with me
so hidden
till known
but why I fail to make sense out of
my flights
too accurate
to the finish
\
but
what is my finish line
I ask too much of mine
source:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
I wonder
who is more spoilt lot
me or my heart
when I want to sleep
my heart wakes up
ask me millionth questions
I have adopted too many techniques
offer hot chocolate fudge to my child heart
It relishes
but ask for more
when I fetch cookies
it says
damn it
who has asked you for that
I really get aghast
what it wants
it says too much
I speak too little
I am fed up with its nonsense around
I run my speed pedals
to give it a euphoric feels
it suddenly puts the breaks
all around
I stand staring at myself
what stuff I have with me
whom it really wants
it hardly tells its choice
but makes me feel
restless all the way
I visualise
its something else
but what it is that
it says
you fool
you can't get an edge of my ways
I put my hands
feel if
whether something exists at all
source::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
me and my steps
talk and walk together
but in crossing directions
leaving me to defend my self
as the heats of fights crush me
over and over again
neither I budge
nor their fights end
every morning and eves too
the struggle remains intact
shapes takes twisty twirly
I have made sand dunes to make me fit to the environs
around and inside me
moments come and crush me mercilessly
I wake up like a ghost
out of the blue
wonder
why and for what I am fighting
why I can't leave my steps
and myself too
source:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
when the northern hemisphere is shivering under the storms of cold
my heart is sizzling hot
it asks me
why we love at all
why we seek warmth of love
why we can not achieve the ultimate relevance, happenings and happiness
without the love being within and around
why we don't feel satiated with accomplishment without love
I replied
yes love is not essential
It fires back
damn fool you are big lier
I do get annoyed at its unsavory words
it asks
damn it
tell me the ultimate science of love
I explain as follows
love is the net outcome of the physiological genomic environment threshold working with the basic principles of psychological aspects of perception, realisation , internalisation and actualisation.
It laughs endlessly
at the fag end of its laughter
it says
you are bullshit spoilt genius
I see the blues
I do wonder
but why I love my love
when I know so so much
source:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
by the time you went to sleep
I was confronting the waives
some mine
the others simply come crashing
I see the smiling hearts
get the resonating aura
to enthuse your love
but I have still to know
what this love stands for
I have fought and fought til date
the end less fighting frontier
my heart has lost contact with me
my nerves stands like a great strength with me
I laugh at both
the heart is meant for tender
so it left me too often
I know it shall come back
as it realises
my warmth
which it fails to find
wherever it happens to be
but til date
I am wanderer lost
in the quest to know
and fight
but hardly aware of
for what
this fighting is going on
with no ammunitions visible
may be
my war frontiers
it have evolved to space age
source:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
the moments of unknown thresholds
as the clocks tick its fast tone
I steer clear of
what has already got through
may be
my evolutionary nerves
they have realised my soul
references of the gone by
with the inbuilt genii quotient
may shall prove come forth
at the slightest glimpse of
new challenges
but I shall define the time
I am promising to fight
a new battle front
source: ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::