FLOWERS OF RAJPATH..Feb.27,11.8.18 PM

I have just taken my psychiatric medicine: a simple naked truth with me: I will go to sleep under its effect after say 45 minutes. I know its effect will dilute by just before 2.AM and I will be left to negotiate my tsunami of self created vacuum. I do come to a feeling to talk to you when you cross your inhibitory quotient to come on line ,visible. My heart asks just talk to her. I love her too much. I know I love her too much. But my love is simply not understood at any level of cognisance of know how. May be I've crossed the scientific know how itself. I don't know. I may look too schizophrenic or neurotic may be psychotic. But why I am putting these words over here. I know many psychiatry awakened have to read my this love letter. I simply want to confuse them . Reason is very simple. No science can understand me. As I myself don't understand me, I know this is also a psychiatric disorder in itself.

but I am happy that no one is there to bully me. Some times living alone is a bliss. Otherwise too I simply don't like anyone around me. Again the reason is simple. I simply don't love any one. But my heart asks then whom you love. I only say : I don't know. It gets annoyed. I really don't know how to pacify my heart. I simply tel : even if I engage my sweet heart to talk to me : it makes no difference. The cruel reality is constant fact with me. I do make such efforts to change it.

Probably I am made just to fight with my nerves and remain busy

sometimes at my work
another at my vacuum

FLOWERS OF RAJPATH..Feb.27.11, 11.14 AM

monotony of my heart
and my docile environs

I make every nanosecond
full of relevance

with a gist full of thoughts

but my heart
it simply brushes aside
all what I have made so assiduously

I hardly know
how to please this spoilt devil

I was reading one of the pages
once relevant to me
now its practically obsolete
as the time has run too fast
what I could catch of it

I do wonder
why the stupid like me
exists on the swampy soils

where there is no need of any worth

I recally my horrific bio know how

the reply is equally horrific

I skirt to know
my own reality

my colleague seniors often laugh at me
sir, your biggest enemy is your knowledge only

I do accept it
but my brain simply differs

my heart says
what the hell you can do
you have lost
what I aspire for
with this bullshit thing you have got

I struggle hard
to please my heart

every day and night

FLOWERS OF RAJPATH..Feb.27,11.1.19.AM

one day Nanak was sleeping with his feet towards the masjid of Makka etc. A muslim clergy came and said don't you stupid realise that you can not sleep whilst your feet put towards the holy masjid of Makka. etc etc. Guru Nanak replied look man !! I am too too tired ! can you pull my legs to a direction where you feel your coveted masjit is not there. The man tried his best. but the masjid direction simply moved with the direction of feet of Nanak. He realised his worth and begged for pardance.

I will not write here the gist: as its hidden one

but I can write who has got boosted his ego to pulverize his dubious conscience to thwart the love forces can simply get another dare devil genius reply when the need is felt.

FLOWERS OF RAJPATH..Feb.27,11.12.10

when the rival groups of Mahabharta war of righteousness was just to unfold itself. Both the groups were searching their best to entice the coveted warriors. Lord Krishna was representing the pandwa side. A man known as Barbarik appeared on the scenario of war front. Lord krishna and others after getting news of his worth immediately went to this man. Lord asked Well!! can your goodness tel us from which side you will fight. He replied from the side which happened to loose the war. Lord realised his ultimate powers. The Lord said okay then your good self can tel us about your prowess: He said I can simply pierce all the leaves of a tree with one arrow (ordinary one.), which he proved whilst krishna kept one under his feet, and astonishingly it was also pierced. Lord realised all. He one fine day begged his head in disguise. He obliged the lord as he knew Krishana is a god. He said atleast I should be given a chance to see the war. Lord put head on a tree. When the war ended, Arjuna believed he did all. Krishna asked his head what he saw. He said I only saw the sudarshna chakra ( weapon of the lord krishna) cutting the heads . Lord krishna blessed his life again and said you will be remembered after my name and equal to me til eternity. Now this man is known as Shri Khadushriram ji and his temple is in Seekar District of Rajasthan.

but why I wrote whole of the story here:

the gist is: inspite of your infinite powers your wish of your love remains at the hands of the almighty.

here Barbarik love was his wish to make the loosing party to win.

FLOWERS OF RAJPATH..Feb.26.11.8.35PM

yesterday I just put my steps as usual
but my deviated path
my heart asked where are you going

my streamy thoughts took a break
the pines of Rajpath
they simply said
how are you

I know plants speak
not only with each other
but with the enviorns too

I asked instead
do you feel
I am a part of your environment

they replied in reverberated tone
that's the only truth

I saw some of the pine cones
they were sending their messages

their wavelengths
which I only can decipher

but I didn't stop

just waiving a reciprocal way
as I do at my office

I hardly engage anyone
in prolonged discussion

the reason is too simple

my heart remains obsessed with his love

and me

just lost to understand

what my heart wants


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FLOWERS OF RAJPATH Feb 26.11,1.22 AM

when the night has asked all

have a time of your own

my heart has awakened me

to feel the three phases of time

some of its a constant relevance of mine

I have seen the changing time

so is the case of my own self

but my memories bring tsunamis

some known to me

others I want to forget

at this moment I'm visualising the best pulsating moments

but I am not nostalgic at my nerves

may be I have come of it

or either it has made my heart neutral itself

resons may be many

one plausible may be

I have taken birth just today

without the natural process of a motherhood

it looks too unscientific

but its a fact

when love is just at your arm's distance

such process do occur

but I am not sure in my case

I am simply feeling it

as the scintillating airs are flowing straight to my room where I reside and recall you as the clock clicks itself

but I do ask myself

do I love you

or I have evolved to an extent

that love has started oozing out of my own psyche

my heart is simply sleeping

this is an interpretation of my brain

I do wonder

how my deadly rivals

they have got friends

is it you

who have done so

source: neha c mehta, kiran&anu,

FLOWERS OF RAJPATH..Feb.24.11.2.03 PM

Indian system is so complex that issues of corruption etc can not be handled the way the so called spiritual leaders are visualising. Our society is heterogentic, cast ridden,regionalistic ,non nationalistic and opportunistic. The hysteric methods are simply not feasible.

the plausible system derivatives can bring the changes what are really required. It implies that what Manmohan Singh team is doing , its results will be seen over the period. The patience is needed. Sheela Dikshit could be the prospective Manmohan Singh. The remaining part is just a power catching mechanism.

In gist, the corporatisation of the Indian economic face, in an holistic manner is the only reply to all evils around. The system of dual shape of economy is exactly perfect that means a state run system should stand handy to compel/trigger the counter effects of pathetic capitalistic forces