WAR ROOM..30 Oct 10..11.50.PM

I do not know hindi typing therefore hereinunder is the highlish lines

ham thei jinke saharei
wo huei na hamarei

reit ki diwarei
jo bhi chahei
gira dei

dubi jab dil ki dunia
samnei thei kinarei

I generally order my Army people to stop old songs and particularly when I enter your room make it sure that your pc is not tuned to your bullshit hindi songs

generally they are so scared of my aversion to hindi songs the moments they see me they put the volume off

I do realise their difficulty

but sad songs put my system off to such an extent that I have to take my psychiatric medicine in multi-dose

they also understand my problem
so they hardly feel bad at my orders

And Now I have typed this sad hindi song in hinglish

I know they are very touchy and make the soul stir with reality crunch

one day my lady officer litterally asked me Ahuja Sir, I am sorry to go personal but you are litterally burning out your life that really puts me in pains.

I could not stop my heart to be burdened by my friends remarks

My brain did ask me : is that you are suffering because you don't have lady love with you. I stared at myself and asked please don't poke me further.

Now when my lady officer confronts me : I often give an extra respect to her:
She remarked yesterday: Ahuja Sir, I am happy you realise the sane nerves suggested by me : but it doesn't matter if you can not be blessed with what I wish

I respect her because she has a space for at her heart

Life does not afford rose gardens: Its a well sung song and poem too

but such songs do bring a solace to you : may be sometimes self defeating

males do not weep : Particularly my type : therefore they go on accumulating the crunch of life at their heart.

it suddenly find a niche in such songs

but the war never ends

because War can be started


But NO BODY KNOWS WHEN A WAR SHALL END
AND AT WHAT COST.

source: Dr.Dimple Bansal, Shipra.v

WAR ROOM ..30 Oct 10.2.21PM

this aspiration elixir innovative entity has been a source for my Stormi neurotic exuberance ever since she met me in my previous office corridors, often crossing each other , me spelled out with my unending thoughts either of my interiors or related with taxing work equations and she probably used to come out only to have a sip of chilled water at hand's distance placed water cooler.

she is still at that very office

but time has made me to fly off the world to other endless equations ridden with forbidden know how

Whilst drafting my notings I used to remember her and see her office premises in a way get my nerves cooled that got perplexed and exhausted with the complex nature of my job.

Now she is busy with hubby to romance the life

I have again fled to a distance beyond her reach of apprehension

One day I will get evaporated to another enigmatic whirlpools

by that time she may get an idea of love and proximity of souls

Today I have fled with momentous quickness to a world of oblivion where I have lost deliberately what I have had and used be worried about

I have made dunes with horrible perfection with horrible know how
whilst I knew the sand dunes has to get wiped out with the whims and fancies of whirly winds

but she is not aware of anything at all

but I am still at war

whilst confronting the toughest fights emanating from within and without

I remember her words " I do not understand poetry"

but I know
I hardly write poems

the reality is what
probably she looks at

source: shipra.v , Dr. Dimple

WAR ROOM

I have attended such gatherings too many times
Univ somehow told me in infinitesimal advance
success do brings disdain and disgust
and the very people for whom you come off your budds are the source of catastrophic antithesis of your life in all respects

I do myself feel aghast when I am writing these lines

but lack of contrary proof is compelling to accept the acidic reality
Its true one should feel positive
but reality and its scientific calculations do not point to any such thing at all

Does it mean we have to survive whole of the rest life without the very people on whom our love started and reside
Its true in horrible terms

biggest reason is
there is no one left who loves you
and your system hardly accepts their gesture- attire and acts as parts of what love matters

I feel its better to accept vacuum rather to succumb to such eventuality

but even if you accept the vacuum
reality bite shall not stop eroding your inner tranquility

source: Shipra.v, Dr Dimple Bansal

I WANT TO RUN AWAY FR MY SELF

This is what my heart says every other second with me


but I have been brought up to fight to the finish

my heart says I simply don't see a finishing line at all

probably there occurs something when you lose every chance of your own world

but I simply say to my heart

I have so much work to be done
so there is no escape rout
irrespective of the factor whether I am happy or too sad

It accepts my version of truth
but says I am here to get crucified at every other moment

I know
I can't stop this crucification of my heart

I see alibi in many forms

I know million hearts fights remain endless
particularly with no useful purpose at day end

when the day end shall come
to fly off to another world

I keep my calm

I know
escapism is no remedy at all

but my heart says
sufferings because of others' faults is no way a wise step
not at least to get the burns for no fault of yourself

I get to stop with no words

I know
I can't pacify my heart

source: Dr Dimple

INFLOURESCENCE..Oct24.10.11.55AM

we are by default (de facto ) are evolved on referral system of psyche development.

this very process is the root cause of agonies
happiness together

I was listening to shiv kumar batalvi
he felt we're are prone to distressful journey
the intellect of ours drags to this reality over the scale of time

I do not know how far the learned poet (punjabi -fr. Syalkot-Now Pakistan)
is at near to reality

I have seen love in you on referral system
that is a truth
As one day I stood eye to eye whilst you wondered at my nerves with disdain and vacuous feels at your heart.

I still love you on the same parameters

you may be getting embarrassed most of time as your reality crunch does not afford this sort of referral system- at all

may be I am that open minded on net only
I never allowed myself to send my creations for publications at our office magazine for the general reading

may be I am not interested in getting accolades whilst airing my love to your aura whilst you being at your nerves ends

I was telling my psychiatrist acquittance that I write to remain relevant
Probably she could not get my nerves

is that love as such has become a part of relevance of life infinitive to me

probably yes

what sort of this life is
my heart asks

I dither too much to tel a little

I know another day shall come

with its own whims and fancies
leaving me to negotiate with no end at all

source shipra .v

INFLOURESCENCE..Oct.24.10.2.11AM

by this time my heart has stopped to toe my way of line of thoughts
I dare not ask any question
I know its reasons shall stir my soul out of the storm into another set of storms
I was at Faridkot a few days back
I did look deep into the blue
you never seemed anywhere around

but your aura did haunt me

I know
illusions do serve a purpose
when you have lost all relevance around

but the snap which I chose to express my delusions and disgust of the reality
it has its own constraints
as I hardly find the love oozing out of the blue
once it was there
on the end less shore

I have accepted this de facto reality

may be acceptance serves to soothen your hardened nerves

when the whole world is fast asleep
I am busy to pen down your thoughts

I am happy
whilst I know
there is nothing to be happy around

my heart whispers
is it
this sort of terrorism is all around

I stop short of saying

yes !!! its there

source: shipra .v

INFLOURESCENCE..18.9.10..10.57PM

I wanted to catch something useful and interesting cache of thoughts at your honeymoon snaps

may be
I have lost interest at your being around
or
your choice is too distasteful to evoke something good

Its often said
love never dies
irrespective of bad choice and combinations

but I do wonder at my wisdom

well personal choice and private decisions
no thought can challenge the wisdom

is it that
I envy your figurative appearances
ironically my nerves felt fused


may be I am different lot around
as I see
you really made a pathetic choice

shooting a choice
just to succumb to the system

I don't see any good sense around

I remember I once told you on live talk
how does it matter
knowing and acknowledging is different

Love is billionth different lot around

may it shall mean
I love you

definitely the reply is affirmative
with infinite conotations

I know you are aware of my infinite knowledge base

but I do wonder
my whole worldly and ecclesiastical possessions simply failed to work

I do wonder
if we are so much system circumscribed

happy honeymoon
my darlin


source: shipra.v